i know that it is in my character to respect, but it is not the character of my heart . feelings know nothing of respect, whatsoever . so, although i’d laugh my afternoons away with you in common courtesy, as stage curtains barely covering the stage for a play we already know the plot of . my soul will rebel in dark ness my eyes will blaspheme and ooze dis- obedience my lips once curved up toward the bright sky in joy will create an image so repulsive in re volt — a sour old prune . oh... and my feelings — the Castro of my soul . the once in order facade will scatter as g u e r r i l l a s do and mutiny against the absolute truth as much as i love you, my heart, my soul could not and will not be able to cope ... that lie ... that lie is one too crushing, too controversial toward my truth (our truth) too much is at stake ... that is a lie , a pain , that would be too vicious to carry . a lie i am not willing to carry for you ... not this one... not this time...
